2004-02-28 - 2:57 p.m.
Things he did not know about me;
I was depressed (cutting) at Christmas
I was thinking of leaving him
I was thinking of moving to Preston
I was throwing up
I was not for filled sexually.
I was unmotivated by the relationship
I hated most of the holiday in Gambia
I hate cooking and eating meat
I hated being his ‘mother’.
I felt he did not value my work
I felt he did not value my effort in the relationship
I don’t consider red stocks a present to me.
I resented having to work to fund our relationship
I resented him not making more of an effort
I was not comfortable with expressing myself sexually to him
I was not myself (could only be with him on the highs, not the lows)
Why I stayed in the relationship
Because it reinforced that I am not worth making an effort for.
