2004-02-26 - 8:10 a.m.
I hate him. Which is weird. I kind of understand what he did. I must have blinded myself to how it was going. Really. He wasn’t happy, and I wasn’t ether, we never saw each other, and our sex life was crap. I was so focused on him –my fault not his. He was my purpose.
I think that’s a failing of mine, from my mother. I have a fear of being left, so i stay. holding as tight as i can. its shit. i really do deserve more that him. or i deserve to be on my own and do my own thing. i can't belive how weak i was, how needy, how distructive to my self.
